(With special thanks to the wit provided by www.urbandictionary.com...)
blame - n. or v.
1. to put all of the consequences unto another person. Usually to get yourself out of trouble.
(Origin: 20th & 21st Century Americans)
An awful story appeared on yesterday’s front page section...
Last summer an 18 year old, beautiful young lady in Cincinnati tragically ended her own life. She had succumbed to the emotional strains of insult and ridicule, resulting from “sexting.” On their 2008 spring break trip, Jessica and her 2 girlfriends each chose to take nude photos of themselves with their cell phones. Jessica intentionally disseminated her bare picture to one teen boy, and the photos were then unknowingly distributed to multiple other teens (who, for the record, are not necessarily known to be the wisest segment of our population). After approximately 2-3 months of taunting - and aware of a schoolmate who recently hung himself - Jessica did the same. I cannot imagine the depth of the grief and sorrow her family must feel.
But that is not the awful front page story...
In an 11 page document filed in the Court of Common Pleas of Hamilton Co., Ohio, Jessica’s parents filed suit this week against her school, their city, a resource officer in their city, Jessica’s 2 girlfriends, their families, the boy to whom Jessica sent her picture, and the other teens accused of distributing the photo. The lawsuit claims negligence, intentional infliction of emotional distress, violation of civil rights, and “pandering pornographic matter.” Jessica’s parents are seeking unspecified compensatory and punitive damages and a monetary atonement for emotional loss.
There is a gulp in my throat as I write this. Yes, it is awful. Jessica’s parents must hurt immensely, and it is a fair criticism to say our empathetic abilities are limited. Yet I cannot help but tearily ask who are Jessica’s parents holding responsible for their daughter’s tragic death? The porn was pandered, but Jessica produced the porn. The school and city did not prevent death, but the parents who saw her daily did not either.
This story is awful... when life is ended intentionally, it is unspeakably heartbreaking. Yet when we ache through such an ugly, gut-wrenching sequence of events, we cannot allow the agony to redirect responsibility. Did others contribute to the pain that so disturbed Jessica? Of course. But was Jessica most responsible for her own death? That is the better question.
My condolences to her family. I am deeply sorry.
AR
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3 comments:
When I first started reading this post, I thought it might be about Nancy Pelosi and her recent backflips around waterboarding. Although the subject turned out to be a more localized incident, I still very much appreciated and and agreed with the viewpoint. Thanks for continuing to be an inspiration!
how clearly all involved need/ed to apply the death of the One who carried all the blame to the grave already, to release us from shame and blaming, empowering us to live, love, and forgive...no further death or payment adequate, or necessary
As the mother of a teen daughter, I hurt so much for this mother who lost her daughter. But at the same time, I am thankful for the awareness it has brought to me and my daughter about the dangers of this new fad. (not to trivialize it with the word fad... but it is popular (hopefully WAS) among some kids) While I don't agree with the parents legal course, I am thankful for the awareness it has brought. (Romans 8:28)
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